Slut Shaming in Cosplay 101

“You’re such a slut! Why? Well…because you have tits. And you have an ass. And you wear a costume which shows those off.”

Have you found yourself saying something similar to a photo online? Or maybe you nonchalantly mention it to your friend as you walk past a woman at a convention you think is dressed too revealing. The judgement is there, and it hasn’t stopped no matter how many times PSAs are put out about how uncool body shaming is.

More recently, there has been a popular uprising in the cosplay community that actually supports this type of body shaming and says its ok to body shame someone if they happen to have nice tits and ass and they show it off in a costume. One recent argument, which errs on the more cautious side, claims the biggest reason slutty cosplay isn’t OK is that these “sexy” versions gain greater attention than their more modest counterparts. Some claim women who choose to dress sexy do it solely for the attention, while others counter-argue why this is a bad thing in the first place.

Finally, there’s the nuanced argument that claims it’s ok to judge sexy cosplay only when character-inaccurate. Well, I’m going to put it out there and say it has to be OK anytime because cosplay is about what we make it. Can we please drop this as an argument altogether? It ruins all the magical things that DO happen when people take on their own interpretations of characters. Besides, I for one absolutely LOVE seeing the human body revealed in a costume–man or woman. When did we become so prude, anyway?

What it really boils down to, though, is this: cosplay has always been about doing what feels good to you, personally, not about judging what anyone else is doing let alone comparing yourself to others.

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There are so many things wrong with everyone looking at a woman in any form of clothing and telling her she is dressed wrong. We’ve been progressing internationally in the last decade with shaming the media for portraying a singular body type of woman not attainable for 99% of the population. Major marketing campaigns have started listening to the masses and learning from companies like Dove, which is pushing for a more holistic view of women’s body types. And now even Barbie is getting a redesign for a more natural body type.

But the one place we are still holding onto? It’s this backwards–yes, backwards–school of thought, that a woman dressing sexy with a nice body should just hide herself or any woman away–any woman who wants to shed some clothing and show off her womanhood. Because that’s a huge part of what it is: showing off our womanhood.

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For thousands of years, the place of woman has been that of a subordinate individual in many societies in many time periods. However our sexuality is one thing we have almost always been in control of, albeit we may have spent years subject to judgement for expressing it openly. Therefore it’s no surprise a woman’s sexuality in the 21st century is so very personal to her, something sacred over which she has fought to maintain autonomy. Just in the last fifty years in America, has seen general public support that it’s OK for a woman to HAVE a libido or to care about expressing her sexuality. No one can argue it’s been an ongoing struggle.

When I was growing up in the ’90s, a child of the new era of this modern woman, I still encountered a great deal of sexual discrimination. I was first called a slut at the ripe age of 10 years old. Why? Because I had had 4 boyfriends by that time. Boyfriends I was too shy to speak to, and hadn’t even held their hand.

No, I wasn’t a 10-year-old slut by any definition, but it struck me to the core. As I got older I certainly wanted to be involved in relationships, and I wanted to grow into a woman with all the womanly features I so desired, but it was also terrifying because I knew how women could be repressed for their sexuality. Madonna, for one, showed us how much slack you can take just for making a book about sex. When I did mature, my DDD breasts were actually made fun of by my closest friends, I was harassed by too many men to count, and I hid a huge part of my sexuality as I was still accused of being a slut, and later, a lesbian because of my flirtatious personality.

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Certainly my story isn’t special. I wouldn’t doubt if most women have been called a slut for just being themselves. It hurts terribly, and it makes you want to shut down and reject who you are…. Which is precisely why the cosplay community is the safe haven for so many. It’s the community that waves a banner proclaiming, “ALL ARE WELCOME: NO BULLYING ALLOWED: EVERYTHING IS PERMITTED: IT’S ALL ABOUT FUN!!” In the cosplay community many women, myself included, have found what feels like a safe place to express themselves. Finding a place where they can be powerful, unrestrained, free.

And yet still the biggest area of discrimination I continue to see is in the market of slut shaming. I gotta say, people: it’s just not ok. If you are going to tell me I can’t walk around in a bikini and high heels and bunny ears because I feel like expressing myself, then you need to get out of the community. And no, I don’t have a costume like that, but I feel like putting one together because I feel like promoting body positivity and the idea that we can dress up how we want to because that’s what this is all about.

In the end, we all just need to remember the number-one rule here in cosplay: have fun!!

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